CLOVER, SC - A California man is facing charges after police say he used an inhaler to steal beer from two men before using his head to break the windshield of a police cruiser.
According to a Clover Police report, officers were called to a Kangaroo Express early Tuesday morning to the report of an armed robbery. Officers spoke to two men who said they were walking along the sidewalk after buying beer and were approached by a man who pointed what appeared to be a silver pistol at them and demanded their beer. The report indicates that the armed man threatened to kill them if they didn't hand over the alcohol. The man, later identified as 23-year-old Ashton Graham of California, then ran away from the scene with a case of Keystone Ice and a case of Budweiser beer. Officers called the York County Sheriff's Office to ask for assistance from the department's K-9 unit to track Graham. Investigators followed a trail of beer cans and empty cartons as the K-9 unit tracked Graham. 911 dispatchers notified officers that employees from a nearby business had called and said that a male covered in blood was on their property and "acting very strange." Employees told officers that the man was "very intoxicated and told them that he had been assaulted by three black males," the Clover Police report states. When employees told Graham they were calling police, he reportedly "got up off the sidewalk, fell down and dropped a Budweiser beer out of his pocket and got back up." That's when ran out into the field behind the company, employees told police. K-9 units were able to track Graham to the woods behind the building and he was placed into custody. Police say when he was being led to the patrol car, he became extremely agitated and very combative with officers. According to the York County Sheriff's report, Graham stared at deputies and screamed "What the [expletive] are you looking at?" Graham reportedly continued to swear at the deputies as they patted him down to check for weapons. A deputy located what appeared to be a cap to an asthma inhaler in Graham's pocket. When the deputy asked Graham if he had an inhaler and he replied, "Yes, I have fucking asthma."
Graham then allegedly reared his head backwards and slammed it into the patrol car's back windshield, shattering the window.
Ive had asthma for about 8 years and cant believe I never thought to use my inhaler as a weapon. Stupid me. My boy Ashton here obviously had this routine down. No way this was his first rodeo, we are talking about a seasoned vet here. Think of all the free Keystone Ice AG has been throwing back on the sidewalk all because his bronchial tubes get inflamed. That inhaler is more versatile than a gun. It obviously gets the point across and when you gotta run away, albuterol up and your good to go. Its really amazing they were able to subdue him, I mean it took getting beat up by 3 black guys, a K9 unit, like 20 cops, and a helicopter to bring him in. You think he was gonna go peacefully. Think again. You kill his buzz hes gonna smash his face through your cruiser windshield. Us asthmatics are lose cannons. We'll steal your beer and smash your windows.
Next time someone asks me if I have an inhaler I'm so saying "Yeah, I have fucking asthma!" with so much fire they'll wish they never asked.
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